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Things My Wife if Better at Than ME ๐Ÿ“‚

**spoiler alert** the answer is everything, except sports and math.
  1. โ€ข
    Halloween costumes
    We're "Under Pressure" circa 2013. All I did was grow a mustache and slick my hair back, she actually channeled David Bowie! There's other examples, this was just the first pic I found. One year we went on a costume cruise and they almost didn't let me on the boat because my costume showed such little effort (brown corduroy pants, green t shirt, "I'm shaggy from scooby doo"), the only reason they let me on was because I showed up with the prettiest Daphne they'd ever seen.
  2. โ€ข
    Education
    She graduated in 4 years, with honors, on the Deans list. Her graduation ceremony was at Angels stadium and Obama was the commencement speaker. Two years later she's about to get her Masters degree. I went to several different schools, never sniffed the deans list and I have no idea who spoke at any of those grad ceremonies - it damn sure wasn't at my happiest place on earth, The Big A! *update* she got her masters and started her job with the county and she's already the best person they have!
  3. โ€ข
    Eating healthy and sticking to her work out program.
    @thefitphilanthropist on most social media if you're looking for inspiration and/or accountability.
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A PUBLIC SERVICE: BOTTOM-LINING THIS WEEK'S US MAGAZINE JUST FOR YOU - ISSUE 09.05.16 ๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿก๐ŸŒฐ๐Ÿšค๐Ÿ’ก

  1. โ€ข
    I think if there's one thing we can all agree on it's that we all trust Josh and I see no reason why we should have to explain ourselves.
  2. โ€ข
    You have to understand. I come from the era of 21 Jump Street Johnny Depp...
  3. โ€ข
    ...so this is incredibly painful for me and, quite possibly, this week's Haunt My Nightmares image.
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WHICH CELEBRITY WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO LOOK LIKE?

I am a genie, granting you the wish of looking like any celebrity. ๐Ÿ”ฎ
  1. โ€ข
    Keri Russell
    She's beautiful in a normal way. Also, Waitress.
  2. โ€ข
    Toby Kebbell circa Black Mirror
    I'd rock it
    Suggested by ย  @joemurphy
  3. โ€ข
    Emily Blunt
    Pretty sure she doesn't even need make up.
    Suggested by ย  @mamie
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Having a Glorious Me Day

Hubs is out of town, so I've decided to make it a me day. No people, no chores, just a great big date with myself.
  1. โ€ข
    7.7 mile hike in the cool of the morning!
    19,304 steps! I'm a machine! This gif is vv accurate, btw.
  2. โ€ข
    Finished the audiobook, Brain Maker
    Good but dryyyyy. Has convinced me that good gut bacteria may be the key to everything.
  3. โ€ข
    Hung out with Mildred, the cat I'm watching for the weekend.
    She's finally come around to me after a solid 24 hrs of suspicion.
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sad:/

  1. โ€ข
    Just found out a friend took his life having overdosed on heroin.
  2. โ€ข
    *throws hands in the air*
  3. โ€ข
    I'm pretty tired of this.
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Hunt the good stuff

Aka how to control your thoughts and be instantly happier when things are crappy.
  1. โ€ข
    It's been a hard week.
  2. โ€ข
    Our movers cancelled on us on a day my husband and I both arranged to be home from demanding jobs.
  3. โ€ข
    Luckily they came the next day.
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American clichรฉs I've encountered today

  1. โ€ข
    Wait I'm not in Portland
  2. โ€ข
    Cars seller with tons of flag ?! Am I in an episode of The Middle ?
  3. โ€ข
    "Wait Lisa that's not an American clichรฉ at all" you think outraged...
    Wait for it
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๐Ÿ•CHICAGO OR NEW YORK PIZZA? ๐Ÿ•

Tonight I'm having dinner with my fav Lisa @Lisa_Fav and will witness as she tries her VERY FIRST Chicago pizza!! To commemorate this, let's find out what kind of pizza li.sters prefer. DUN DUN DUNNN
  1. โ€ข
    I know this is a very tense subject so I will get the ball rolling.
    Psst I like NY pizza better! ๐Ÿ™ˆ (I still enjoy Chicago pizza but New York wins it for me!)
  2. โ€ข
    Chicago style once or twice a year and NY style the rest of the time :)
    Suggested by ย  @loriatx
  3. โ€ข
    Chicago.
    Always.
    Suggested by ย  @BWN_7
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Hunt the good stuff

Inspired by @aminam Sometimes it is challenging to not dwell on the overwhelming worrisome things happening in my life and the anxiety I feel. So 5 Things:
  1. 1.
    I do have a decent paying job that I mostly enjoy. (I'm feeling more motivated about this school year.)
  2. 2.
    I've still managed to keep on my streak of not having soda or sugary beverages for nearly 2.5 months even with school starting!
  3. 3.
    I had a decent amount of Cold Mountain Winter Ale left from last fall (WHY I WAITED IN LINE FOR 2 1/2 HOURS FOR CRAFT BEER) so I was able to enjoy a few last night.
    (I know beer has sugar too - I've been drinking less of that too...mostly)
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I AM SO SORRY!

Today, I FINALLY dealt with an important and critical situation.
  1. โ€ข
    Got my horribly scary eyebrows sorted! Apologies for scaring the living daylights out of small children, seniors and domestic animals.
    Before pic, obvs.
  2. โ€ข
    Much better now!