LOS ANGELES RITES OF PASSAGE

  1. Driving somewhere, but having to turn around and go home because there's no parking.
  2. Lie to a friend about liking their shitty improv show.
  3. Watching a guy use the front-facing camera on his phone to fix a decorative scarf.
  4. Saying "we really needed it" when it rains.
  5. Losing touch with a friend forever because they move out of your neighborhood.
  6. Eating kale on purpose