THE RECIPE YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED

So you know the best part of the ice cream cakes you loved as a child? The crunchy, chocolate, crumbly bits that made a Carvel cake worth the effort of consuming at all? You can make those bits TOTALLY IDIOT PROOF!
  1. Dry: 2 parts cocoa, 2 parts powdered sugar, 1 part flour fat pinch of salt blended together in a bowl.
    You don't have to blend that thoroughly. If the word 'part'is distracting, replace it with a unit of measure like tablespoon or ounce.
  2. Mix in 1 part of melted butter. As you are pouring it in, spread it around. Don't put it all in one spot.
  3. Mix it in mainly by mashing it together using an instrument, spatula, spoon or your fingers work.
    It gets kind of pasty, like dry mud.
  4. The powder is clumping together, it's a shade darker because the butter has soaked in....
    Pressing against the side of the bowl makes it easier.
  5. Rub the mass of paste between your fingers (that doesn't sound obscene at all) and little pebbles - gravel takes shape
  6. Dump on to a little tray lined with foil (my tray came from one of the toasters we've set on fire) still rolling the dough to make little clumps.
  7. Spread out on the tray in an even layer.THIS IS THE ONLY IMPORTANT STEP. Gently shake/tap the pan to level things.
  8. Bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for like 10ish minutes. Or until it smells real chocolatey, deep, rich yet another shade darker, nearly black. You could do this in a toaster.
    When you take it out let it cool COMPLETELY don't futz with it, don't shake the pan ... 10 minutes seriously, just wait.
  9. Put some in the bottom of the bowl...
  10. Ice cream or gelato or whatever makes your heart glad, and more crunchies on top..
  11. So good 😊
    You're welcome.