TOP 11 COOLEST T SHIRTS I OWN

  1. Starting off with a bang: Mind Your Business. It's a t shirt and a lifestyle, ok?
  2. Morrissey Can't Dance. I found this in a super weird thrift store. I really just want to know who made this and why. Did they wear it to his concert with venomous love for music's most misanthropic? Did they wear it there in protest of his terrible dancing? Was it just to make a statement on a regular day? In any case, it's true, he can't.
  3. Black is Beautiful. I bought this in San Francisco in 1974. Just kidding, it was 1997, but on Haight-Ashbury nonetheless. It just seemed right at the time but I have niether worn it nor thrown it out since.
  4. Egypt. Because Egypt.
  5. Nine Basic Scribbles. This is by far my favorite of the moment. I have searched high and low but have come to the conclusion that this t shirt really does only exist to depict your 9 basics. Its got your swirl, circle, line, zig zag, just the basics. It's not a band nor is it made by Crayola. It's just the coolest t shirt ever made and that is all.
  6. Bootleg Madonna tee I bought off Ebay for $13. I saw someone wearing the same one on the street the other day and I was so excited and surprised that I literally rolled my bike into the wedge of a sewer grate and got stuck and had to spend 5 minutes trying to pull it out.
  7. I Love New York. Yes, this shirt looks like it barely survived the war against time. But it was my grandmother's, a true New Yorker who grew up in the LES, and raised a family on Long Island. Her accent was so strong that I thought her friend Matilda's name was "Matilder" until I was 13. The big apple is so bizarrely placed. It's very special.
  8. This shirt is all about Brainerd, Minnesota. Fargo takes place there. There is a hot ass lumberjack who looks like he would be in TV on the Radio on the front wearing galoshes, a new wave flannel and a saucer of a beanie on his sexy head. 💯
  9. Hobie. I always thought this was based on the Hoff's son on Baywatch, but I just found out it's the other way around and Hobie was just your all around radical skater surfer guy of the 80's. My friend screen printed Biz Markie on top of him, as if things could get any more radical than the Hob alone in all his glory.
  10. Max Headroom. The creepy sarcastic man talking to you from inside your TV which was supposed to seem futuristic in the 1980's.
  11. And, The Daily News, New York's Hometown Paper. Not much explanation required, it's just a goodie.