REASONS CAROLINE IS WAY BETTER THAN I AM

Because it's your birthday, and I have to be nice.
  1. She is a senior staff writer
    I am only a staff writer
  2. She has 20 years of life experience and wisdom
    I only have 19
  3. She can fly and dance at the same time
    I can do neither
  4. Chad's power in international affairs is LEGENDARY
    Australia is protectionist, in comparison
  5. She has had the grace of receiving Cornelia Dean's edits on an article
    One time Cory called me out for spelling an author's name wrong
  6. She planned to make my family a book about Vermont
    I mooched a ride to school off of her family
  7. She has watched the West Wing multiple times
    I have only watched it once
  8. She is a wonderful, bright, talented, witty, friendly human being
    I wish I could be more like her
  9. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CJ!!!🎉🎉🎉
    May your year be full of wonder and excitement!