T-Shirts can say a lot! Try not to judge a book by its cover, but with this list, you can do that.
  1. Black T-Shirt
    You are warm on summer days, my friend! Try not to befriend too many Black T-Shirts; they may belong to people who are not your friends, but rather an elaborate long-form improv social experiment.
  2. Red T-Shirt
    A Red Shirt is warm, no-nonsense, and feisty. If you wear a Red Shirt every day eventually you have to quit your job and become a stop sign. It's true!
  3. Gray T-Shirt
    Gray Shirts are non-committal, wishy-washy, and don't know what they want. All the cool boys at my High School wore Gray Shirts, and now they're all--you guessed it--stop signs. Guess they should've been wearing Red Shirts all along!
  4. Blue T-Shirt
    You've made a mistake.
  5. Green T-Shirt
    You are Albanian.
  6. Orange T-Shirt
    You can't legally purchase an Orange T-Shirt in America so this means you are a criminal/crime person.
  7. Sandwich Board
    Bucking the shirt trend altogether! Sleek, very cool. Befriend!