1. Am I even clever and witty enough to own this app?
    Should I delete it before I embarrass myself?
  2. What if my TWO followers don't think it's funny or interesting?!
    My life would be over.
  3. The first of everything always sets the tone for how things will go in the future
    If my first list sucks then all my lists will suck, right?
  4. What if I think I'm channeling Amy Schumer but I'm really giving off more of a Rosie O'Donell vibe?
    No one likes Rosie.
  5. What if I can't stop making lists once I start?!?
    Is being addicted to making lists a thing?
  6. Fuck it. I'm making a list.