WHAT I PREDICT I WILL EAT TODAY

Written while lying in my bed watching food network at 10:24 am
  1. 11:24: a pop tart
    I'll probably spend the next hour trying to convince myself to make some weird healthy shit for breakfast and by 11:20 I'll have decided my normally stable blood sugar is too low to wait longer and will devour a pop tart, maybe 4
  2. 12:10: whatever my mom ate for dinner last night
    I'm supposed to drop something off to my mom at noon. I'll probably casually mention that I don't have any food in my house and she'll force leftovers on me.
  3. 1:30: an inappropriate amount of food for a social situation
    This afternoon ill be attending an open house at a friend of a friends. Past experience shows I will spend too much time at the food table and then loudly complain about how full I am for the rest of the party
  4. 7: a wildly expensive salad
    Feeling mournful at how much I've eaten over the course of the day, by 6:30 or 7 I will get my heart set on a 15 dollar salad for dinner. It will probably be primarily toasted nuts, cheese and fruits but there may be a few scraps of lettuce