MR. WILLAKER'S CURMUDGEONLY NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS
That he has managed to keep, thank you very much!
- •See less family.Those pestering little nephews are always making such a ruckus
- •Stop buying cheese at the local dairyIf they think I won't drive ten minutes out of my way to the supermarket to avoid those price increases, they have another thing coming
- •Petition local government about banning excessive holiday decorIt's a traffic hazard. All those green and red lights! Harrumph!
- •Seal windowsills against sounds of children's laughter at nearby park/ fresh airWhy they insist on having TWO jungle gyms is beyond me
- •Cancel subscription to AARP MagazineWhy should I care about Harrison Ford?
- •Eat more fiber