Here's what I got for the fourteen ballparks I've visited. Ranking factors include ambiance, food, beer selection, location, local crowd's awesomeness level, my level of bias for the home team, and the X factor of "did my level of booze consumption prior to and during the game make me underrank or overrank this ballpark during my time there?"
  1. #14. US Cellular Field
    Bad neighborhood, cramped, and unremarkable
  2. #13. Yankee Stadium
    Typical Yankees- a massive, sterile expression of what some rich guys who see themselves as "guardians of the legacy" think a stadium should be
  3. #12. Wrigley Field
    Hate to be the bad guy, but this place is quickly becoming a dump. Good location, though.
  4. #11. Coliseum
    Would've ranked lower but the fans are rad, the beer is cheap, and Moneyball gives me feelings.
  5. #10. Marlins Park
    Like a trendy 80's coke party in a warehouse
  6. #9. Angels Stadium
    Disneyland is not a good design aesthetic for a ballpark and the Rally Monkey must die, but I overall would describe it as "sufficient" and "inoffensive"
  7. #8. Chase Field
  8. #7. Citi Field
    I have photographic evidence that proves I have physically been to this ballpark.
  9. #6. Citizens Bank Park
    Pluses = cheese steaks, party deck, and view of downtown. Minuses = getting on the one train from the one station to leave this middle-of-nowhere park is an apocalyptic last-chopper-out-of-'Nam experience
  10. #5. Target Field
    Fairly standard new park with great location, nice fans, and bloody marys with sliders on top
  11. #4. Nationals Park
    Tailgate party lot with cornhole and the mascot is a bald eagle
  12. #3. Safeco Field
    Neutral location, great food, bullpen bar with DJ
  13. #2. Dodger Stadium
    HATE the parking lot situation, but it has a sweet retro vibe with modern facilities, sunshine, and beer floats. The perfect park for a lazy Sunday afternoon game.
  14. #1. Petco Park
    Craft beer, local food, great location, and now includes Matt Kemp's face. What's not to love?