1. I was replaced by a shapeshifter and none of my friends noticed for like a week
  2. My robot butler is starting to feel feelings
  3. I left a banana out while I was in orbit and it's all brown now because it aged faster than I did
  4. By going back in time to prevent my awkward faux pas, I actually ended up causing it
  5. My communicator died and we were stranded on some shitty barren planet ruled by mutants for hours
    Little did we know, it was Earth the whole time
  6. I keep forgetting which realities we're dating in and which ones we're exes in
  7. I dropped my transdimemsional holoprojector in the toilet and the rice trick totally isn't working
  8. The simuweather in my moon-based atmospheric dome is on the fritz and this humidity is killing my hair
  9. I got sucked into a black hole and now every atom of me is being compressed into a singularity
  10. I'm not speciesist, but my new neighbors are from Noxon Prime and their food smells really weird