REASONS WHY I WON'T GET UP AND CHANGE THE CHIRPING SMOKE DETECTOR

  1. Seriously? It's going off at this hour?
  2. I thought those batteries were supposed last like 10 years...
  3. Maybe it'll just chill out on its own. Maybe it's just a spasm.
  4. Maybe it'll die entirely and I won't have to get up.
  5. Fine, in a few hours I'll change it.
  6. {wakes up again} {still going} Ugh, come on! Why me???
    Um, or your house could be burning down you spoiled $&*#%!
  7. Okay, okay, I guess I'll change it.
    Then, magically, the chirping stops.
  8. Oh nevermind then {goes back to sleep}
  9. My house is going to catch on fire in retaliation now, right? Fine, I'll change it. If I can figure out which one it was.