NOTABLE THINGS MY YOUNGER COUSINS SAID WHEN I BABYSAT THEM LAST NIGHT

They are 11, 8, and 4.
  1. "I KNOW that dogs fart."
    Doubt was cast about who'd actually passed gas. This line was presented from the defendant when he blamed the dog.
  2. "Are you texting your boyfriend or your girlfriend? Do you have a girlfriend?"
    I'm straight and single, but when my 4 yr old cousin asked me this, my heart kinda lifted up. Toddlers from my conservative town (and family) aren't typically taught to think this way, so it made this rebellious little liberal really proud :')
  3. "Are your mom and dad boyfriend and boyfriend?"
    This followed the conversation referenced above.
  4. "STEPH CURRY WITH THE DUNK!!!!"
    Preceded by "Will you Snapchat this?"
  5. "Fart Nuggerts!"
    My new favorite curse word
  6. "Will you text our mom? Tell her the kids are all right."
    There's no way she understood what she'd just said.
  7. "What's new on snapchat lately?"
    Spoken like the true adult-trying-to-talk-to-millennials my tiny cousin actually is.