Reasons I Don't Feel Like Attending my 25th High School Reunion Dinner Later Tonight
In no particular order, these are the reasons why I am strongly considering not going to this allegedly fun dinner this evening. The only reason I am considering going is that @tweedledee says it will make for a great list tomorrow.
- 1.IDGAFFirst and foremost, I've run completely out of f*cks, and I keep forgetting to replenish my stash.
- 2.Mediocre RestaurantThere are several good restaurants in this town. Several. So naturally, this group has chosen a restaurant that peaked in 1991. Oh. Oh I see what they did there.
- 3.Small TalkAgain with the f*cks I don't have. The age of Facebook has gotten me in touch with everyone I wanted to be in touch with from high school, and none of those people will be at this dinner. I'm 100% not interested in hearing about the various marriages, children, and calamities that have happened in the lives of people that I have never, ever hung out with outside of a required p.e. Class in 1989.
- 4.Drunk PeopleI drank professionally for the better part of the last 20 years, so it's really painful to watch amateurs try to participate in something that I hold a PhD in. By the third drink, they'll start getting goofy and asking me why I'm not drinking or dancing or start telling me how little they actually drink, really.
- 5.TelevisionTo be honest, there's a two-hour Dateline Mystery and a 48 Hours Mystery episode on tonight.
- 6.Prince is still dead.This will be my official excuse - that I am still having a difficult time having fun in a world without Prince Rogers Nelson around. It really is true. I'm having a difficult time with him being gone. I'm better off staying home tonight.
- 7.The heat.It is 356 degrees in the sun today, which means I can't wear the sequined jumpsuit I'd picked out. Fck it. I'm staying home.