Why Pokémon Go is trying to kill all of us.

True stories from going Pokémon hunting with friends.
  1. It takes you down some shady back alleys.
    This guy just appeared while we were out driving. Pulling over, we soon realized it was taking us down an old ally no one has probably been down in years.
  2. Some Pokémon only come out at night.
    Me and some friends went out at 3am to go Pokémon hunting. We also saw others doing the same. In the middle of fields, full of real wildlife, looking for digital wildlife. I live in Colorado. There was a cougar loose in our town not to long ago.
  3. AAAAH.
    IT WAS IN THE STREET WHILE WE WERE DRIVING. Just... try not to have the app open when driving (I was in the passenger seat).
  4. "Oh, it's just across the street we can just--" "THERE IS A CAR COMING, LOOK UP FROM YOUR PHONE."
    A familiar story in Pokémon Go. This has happened about 4 times so far.
  5. A lot of Pokémon pop up in other people's backyards.
    I'm sure we'll hear a story about someone being shot for Pokémon hunting soon. My neighborhood has no fences. You can imagine the chaos.
  6. Gym battles are terf wars.
    There's a gym down my street that has become a downright terf war for control. You see people hanging out on that street corner all the time now trying to take it for their team. I fully expect this to become West Side Story soon. TEAM VALOR THOUGH.
  7. Still, it's a weirdly social game.
    I have many stories of meeting strangers on the street because of this game. Now excuse me, time to become a POKÉMON MASTER.