THOUGHTS ON MY FIRST HANGOVER WHICH I AM CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING

  1. Surely Jesus didn't wear a crown of thorns for anyone to ever feel like this. Ever.
  2. What's in gin exactly?
  3. I think a french fry came out of my nose last night.
  4. How old is too old to have your first hangover & is it time to be put down?
  5. It's not really fair to be mad at my partner for not having better advice for curing a hangover, but I am, so I guess that's that.
  6. Is tonic a different kind of alcohol? Did I mix something bad?
  7. Was there actual whisky in the whiskey ketchup for my fries?
  8. So people just do this sometimes and just like...deal with it?
  9. Why is this screen so damn bright, Apple?
  10. Why is Siri yelling at me?
  11. Who are you people?