1. I wish the kid would get home already so we could get this over with.
  2. Non-violent communication sounds great but what about when you want to wring someone's neck?
  3. I get that my job is to educate, but what I really want to do is punish the little goober.
  4. Maybe the parenting specialist can get her ass over her and do it herself.
  5. Wait. What? You brought Mommy chocolate? Never mind. You're my favorite!