QUOTES FROM MY MOTHER

(Who I love dearly)
  1. "As long as you have grandchildren I don't give a shit"
    When I came out
  2. "First time for love, second time for money"
    On marriage
  3. "Get a friend, share an uber"
    When I told her I was bored
  4. "The hands tell all"
    On how to tell if someone has had a lot of plastic surgery
  5. "OMG, I found your twin separated at birth!! I'm flipping out right now"
    When she discovered Tyler Oakley 😑
  6. "Why are there no Jewish emoges?"
    Umm....🔯🔯🔯