10 Reasons I would be a better president than Trump

Oooh, @rellimt I likey this suggestion!
  1. 1.
    I have never cheated on any of my wives.
    Amy, Rashida, and Aubrey all know about each other and get along just fine.
  2. 2.
    I know more than 3 words for large, none of them are yuge nor bigly.
    Substantial, colossal, vast, monumental, immense, sizeable... The list goes on.
  3. 3.
    While we are talking about size, my lady hands are actually meant to go on my lady body.
    What's your excuse?
  4. 4.
    I have a degree in Public Relations, so I would never have called in to a radio station PRETENDING to be my own publicist. I am my own publicist.
    Tell John Barron and John Miller to shove it.
  5. 5.
    I have never grabbed a pussy, other than my own. Even then, I still wait until the moment is right.
  6. 6.
    I never would have said Megan Kelly had blood coming out of her "wherever." Because I know female anatomy, and I guarantee there is noting called the Wherever.
    Here, point out the wherever. I dare ya!
  7. 7.
    I can rock back and forth to music without looking like I am just sea sick.
  8. 8.
    I would never let my sons gel their hair back like that.
  9. 9.
    I believe women are people, not fleshlights. I recognize minorities don't all live on one block in Chicago. I don't assume an entire race of people to be one way. I love learning and embracing all religions while finding common ground.
    I have no false memories that America used to be better than it is now. I know damn well that the current president was born in the US. I don't think avoiding paying taxes is smart. I would never be friends with Omarosa. Mike Pence is not a great guy, he is from the dark ages and he is the second to last human person I would ever pick as a running mate.
  10. 10.
    My name is Boogie and I approved this message!