Twiggy's List: Tips To Make Mum Late To Work

My British/Mexican dog wrote this list and asked me to share
  1. First, act like you can't understand her when she says "go outside" and pretend like you have never seen a leash before.
  2. Next, get overcome with emotions because you love being outside so much. Give in!
  3. Sniff something stupid, just to make it look like you have any intention of making this a normal walk.
  4. Investigate every sound thoroughly! We must figure out what that car sound could possibly be out in this parking lot!
  5. Pretend like you like rocks.
  6. Like, you are so into rocks. She will be fooled. I walk past these rocks every day, but when it's time for mum to head to work, they become entertainment.
  7. Investigate a mysterious car sound while pretending to like rocks. Make no sudden movements. Keep stalling. She has no idea.
  8. Taste a piece of grass. She'll think you have a bit of a tummy ache and this will buy you at least two more minutes of outside time. Do not eat the grass unless you want a REAL tummy ache.
  9. Sniff this weird looking stuff Mum always calls "outside cilantro" and really get your nose in there.
  10. Walk the wrong direction when she says "let's go home!"
  11. Act like you have never seen stairs before.
  12. Pretend to be afraid of stairs even though you LOVE the rush of each step making you the biggest dog in the neighborhood.
  13. Hang out at the bottom step. She probably will just stay home now, because she is so going to be late for work!
  14. Okay, you give in and go up the stairs. She fills the water bowl and puts peanut butter inside the Kong. But there is always ONE final trick...
  15. You are so tiny! Hide in plain sight. This could take her 5 more minutes to find you!
  16. Dogs, with my help, you too can make your mums and dads late for work EVERYDAY! 🐾
  17. ~Twiggy Wiggles