Pronunciations and Spellings of My First and Last Name

If this was a Spelling Bee, you wouldn't make it to the stage.
  1. To start, "Brent" and "Wiggins" are the correct spelling.
    You don't see Spanish speakers skipping any letters when they talk, so make sure you spell them correctly. Otherwise, read 'em and weep.
  2. The correct pronunciation of each are "Br-en-tuh" and "Wig-ginz."
  3. Now the misspoken and misspelled:
  4. "Br-ant" as in "Brant"
    Close but no cigar.
  5. "Bre-ant" as in "Breant"
    This isn't even a convincing hybrid of my real name and the word "ant."
  6. "Brr-en-tuh" as in "Brrent"
    My name's so cool I get an extra "R."
  7. "Bre-tuh" as in "Bret"
    Apparently the "N" is silent now.
  8. "Bret-tuh" as in "Brett"
    That's... that's not my name.
  9. "Wig-ganz" as in "Wiggans"
    You get an "A" for effort! Wait...
  10. "Wig-genz" as in "Wiggens"
    You get an "E" for effort. Still not an "A" grade though.
  11. "Wig-inns" as in "Wigins"
    It's Snoop Dogg, not Snoop Dog.
  12. Any other English butchers want to take a cut out of my titles? 🔪
  13. Good. Now let's get it right people.