It's about to get sudsy. Share your Shower Power Hours with us, if you got the suds!
  1. First I disrobe.
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    Let's see how far I can take this list without getting NSFW.
  2. Look myself over with a selfie.
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    You can't take photos with a mirror, duh!
  3. Step into the Splash Zone.
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    I'm excited... about toiletries. Yeah, I'll try to convince myself that later.
  4. Feel the shock, sting and surge of 20,000 cold, liquidized lasers.
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    More like 20 or so, but it felt like 20,000!
  5. Feel the hugging warmth of a hot babbling brook.
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    I know it looks like something else, but look, how else do you wash down South without finding it pleasurable?
  6. Time for suds.
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    For a stud like me. No you're right, I'm not a stud but little Brent is! Boy am I compensating.
  7. Don't drop the soap.
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    Not even if it's just you in there.
  8. Reach a soaked, mop texture.
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    Mops look better.
  9. Sham to the poo.
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    When you think about it, shampoo sounds like a scam to wash your hair with crap.
  10. Rinse off.
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    Squeaky clean!
  11. Dry off.
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    It's not a rat's nest, it's just tumble dryed.
  12. Shut up about looking the same as you did before the shower. No really, no noticeable change was made except a much needed cleansing.
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    Repeat.