Funny Things That Happened on My Way Back Home

I spent five days in southern New Jersey visiting my family while WWHL was taking a nap until Sunday. Here are a few things that happened. And as sorority girls around the world say, "I can't even."
  1. Someone next to me is eating McDonald's. Is it rude if I ask for a French fry?
  2. I baked a pie. And because I baked a pie it gets its own seat.
  3. A woman sitting next to me asked if I could help her put on her bracelet. I then told her "Sure, these things can be so tough and tricky to put on by yourself." She replied, "Yeah, I'm just lazy too." Bitch, I don't even know you.
  4. Overheard a girl saying she was taking a flight out of JFK to Florida. She has so many bags to carry all by herself. God Bless.
  5. I'm on a crowded train, but sitting in the train lobby. If you've ever traveled on NJT you'll understand. I'm kinda creeped out because I'm the ONLY person on my phone. Everyone else is just staring around. Basically, being on your phone is the new normal, and if you aren't, then what the hell is wrong with you?