Things Moms Yell at Their Kids' Soccer Game
Transcribed while attending a game. Soccer-moms be loud.
- •"Let's GOOOOOOOOOO!!!"Mel Gibson Braveheart-like battle cry
- •"You can do it!"Unironic Waterboy reference
- •"Get in there."
- •"Get after it."
- •"Don't stop."All could include 'That's what she said.' But technically she did.
- •"Good job. Good job. It's okay."Always said when the child messed up resulting in the other team scoring.
- •Bonus points to the grandfather breaking down the proper strategy in youth rec soccer.
- •So much backseat coachingA sideline full of Peles
- •"Pass it to <best player on the team>."Everyone knows which kid is the best and believes the victory hinges on that player touching the ball at all times.
- •"Stand up!"Kids have a habit of wanting to sit down on the field while the game is in progress.
- •"Pay attention."Children's attention spans are shorter than the length of soccer games."
- •"You're on the same team."At this point the field is filled with confusion and disarray as players wearing the same uniform viciously fight for the ball.
- •"You guys are working hard."Players are currently walking, begging to be taken out.
- •"You can still do it."After a goal the team is now only losing 9-2.
- •<softly> "That kids must think this is some sort of wrestling match."One of many backhanded side comments said as if the mothers aren't all sitting amongst each other while making remarks about other children.