CARL DIGGLER'S PRIMARY PICKS

Veteran @CAFE pundit puts his 24-for-24 streak on the line as he calls tonight's contests. Cowardly Nate Silver, meanwhile, is nowhere to be found. Below is Carl's attempt to go 30-for-30 as the race ends, hopefully earning his own "30 for 30" episode in the process.
  1. CALIFORNIA—Bernie Sanders
    Yes, Carl is taking the underdog here. While he fears for the safety of "innocent Democratic National Committee Chairpersons" Diggler thinks Sanders' supporters "want it more."
  2. NEW JERSEY-Hillary Clinton
    "Eyy T, grab the gabagool! We're gonna whack Bernie in the freakin' voter booth!" Writes Carl Diggler. Cafe does not endorse this depiction of Italian Americans. He's been on a Soprano's kick.
  3. NEW MEXICO—Hillary Clinton
    "Victory here is as out of reach for Bernie as a pizza on the roof," writes Carl, referring to "Breaking Bad." Carl has had a lot of free time lately, since breaking up with his Tunblr girlfriend "Trash Kween" earlier this year.
  4. SOUTH DAKOTA-Bernie Sanders
    Carl predicts the saloon vote to turn out heavily for Bernie.
  5. NORTH DAKOTA—Bernie Sanders
    Carl predicts the "misogynistic strip clubs favored by Bernie supporters" will be instrumental in winning this state.
  6. MONTANA—Bernie Sanders
    Montana citizens are opposed to nanny-state governments that keep them from drinking silver, which could hurt Hillary here.