Failed presidential candidate Ben Carson has announced his endorsement of Donald Trump for president. Why would a soft-spoken Christian conservative physician like Carson endorse a loud-mouthed adulterous tycoon like Trump? Here’s why!
  1. He made his endorsement available to any candidate who owned a resort within 20 minutes of his Florida home.
  2. Hoping to position himself to perform Trump’s next plastic surgery.
  3. An arranged marriage by the publishers of Carson's "Gifted Hands" and Trump's "Art of the Deal" masterpieces.
  4. Trump patiently sat and let Carson recite all the lines he’d have said in the past six debates if called upon more.
  5. Trump has offered him the role of Education Secretary - as part of a covert scheme to prove the position can be eliminated.
  6. Ted Cruz promised him VP, but was correctly assumed to be lying.
  7. Carson advisor Armstrong Williams wouldn’t let him endorse The Holy Spirit as a write-in.
  8. Being an official endorser is the only way a black guy can attend a Trump rally without getting beat up.