HOW TO BE A WOMAN WALKING ALONE DOWN THE STREET
No matter what, it's gonna suck.
- •Your pace must be swift as the coursing river
- •If you make eye contact, you're totally "asking for it"
- •Same with smiles
- •Or really any visible emotion
- •Headphones are your friend - you will pretend you can hear nothing else when you use themThis makes you a bitch, according to the guys around you
- •Sunglasses are like headphones for your eyesWhich makes you a bitch
- •Strange men will come up to you and touch youYou will push them off you. This also makes you a bitch
- •Strange men will command you to smile for themRefusing to do so makes you a bitch, or possibly a lesbian
- •Strange men will also sometimes follow youThis probably also makes you a bitch
- •Get to your destination. Close the door behind you. Finally breathe.