THINGS MY DOG THINKS ARE TRUE

She's usually wrong.
  1. I can stop in the middle of peeing to throw that ball.
  2. That guy out there is coming in to get our food.
  3. The mailman is really coming for our food.
    He almost got in yesterday.
  4. The vacuum cleaner is alive and needs to be watched closely.
  5. It's her job to lick people's feet dry after they get out of the shower.