Following is a list of ways my parents were bad at parenting. This was from 1973 through 1991, so some of it was just "the way it was," but a lot of it was bad parenting. Like really bad parenting. But I turned out a-ok. Well mostly. A few people think I'm a dick. But MOSTLY I'm normal and likeable. I think. P.S. I had one sibling: older brother.
  1. They let us drive around pretty much my entire childhood without wearing seat belts while in the car
  2. There were no books in the house except a paperback biography of Elvis Presley
  3. They let us listen to way way age-inappropriate records like George Carlin
  4. They let us watch R-rated movies and like super scary stuff that gave us nightmares
  5. When I had nightmares and tried to crawl into bed with my mom to feel safe, she would yell at me and make me go back to my own room
  6. They would smoke cigarettes in the car with the windows all rolled up while we were in the backseat. For hours at a time.
  7. After they got divorced, Mom had a hard time holding a job and often creditors would call and me and my bro had to field all their phone calls and make up excuses for why Mom wasn't home
  8. Often, the utilities would get shut off
  9. We hardly ever had "home cooked" food and ate things like microwave french fries for dinner most nights
  10. My mom and aunt would steal credit card numbers from somewhere and use them to sign up for Q-Link and AOL without paying for them
  11. One of my mom's loser boyfriends figured out how to hack the cable box so we'd get way more channels than we paid for and sometimes we'd all sit together watching soft porn on the Playboy Channel together as a family activity
  12. My mom and her boyfriends would often disappear for hours in her bedroom and have loud sex and smoke marijuana
  13. My Mom OD'd on sleeping pills several times and had to be hauled out in an ambulance but refused to get counseling or go on anti-depressants
  14. My mom said it was okay to drink from her liquor cabinet without asking when I was ~15
  15. I didn't have a curfew. I'd often be out all night and she would not know whether I even came home or not
  16. My mom would get suicidal and call me (after I left for college) and I'd have to "talk her down."
  17. My mom had me and my brother save nickels and dimes and whatever we could in a bank account where she told us we were "saving for college" but then she secretly withdrew it ALL and spent it on drugs and/or to pay bills with it without telling us.
  18. Mom would send us to bed early and then proceed to watch XXX porno tapes in the living room. It was a small house so we could hear the bad music and the hump-grunting sounds.
  19. Mom would make us do all kinds of chores to earn an allowance but we never actually got an allowance.
  20. In the early days of AOL, Mom would meet stranger dudes online and then fly to meet them and leave my bro and me home alone for several days
  21. They didn't read to us
  22. They didn't take us to do family activities, go to the library, go to events like art fairs or plays or like anything.
  23. One day for Christmas, my Dad forgot to get us presents so as a present he gave us a used television set that he got for free from a friend
  24. My mom didn't like to spend money on wrapping paper so for Christmas, my bro and I would each get a black trashbag that had our presents in it
  25. One year we put up Christmas lights in the living room and my Mom was too lazy to take them down so they stayed up there for literally a decade
  26. When I was in choir and in plays, my parents would never come see me perform
  27. I have written and/or edited several books and helped produce a movie and my parents have not read any of the books or seen the movie
  28. Haha why did I just share all that. TMI? I'll bet all of y'all's parents were way better.
  29. 😭😩😭