Go on. Add some of your own favorites. Poetry. Shock value. Pure joy. I want to read the amazing opening lines that move you.
  1. I run the God damn pretzel store at Buckingham Mall
    You could be her. Jonathan Coulton.
  2. I built a little empire out of some crazy garbage / called the blood of the exploited working class
    Kiss me, son of god. They might be giants.
  3. They say 3 percent of people use 5 to 6 percent of their brain / 97 percent use just 3 percent and the rest goes down the drain
    Statistician's Blues. Tom snyder.
  4. I found a wallet / I found a wallet
    Wallet. Regina Spektor
  5. Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray / South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio
    We didn't start the fire. Billy joel.
  6. I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping / while my guitar gently weeps
    While my guitar gently weeps. The beatles.
  7. Woke up this morning and it seemed to me, / that every night turns out to be / A little more like Bukowski. / And yeah, I know he's a pretty good read. / But God who'd wanna be? / God who'd wanna be such an asshole?
    Bukowski. Modest Mouse.
  8. Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma? / I've seen those English dramas too / They're cruel
    Oxord comma. Vampire weekend.
  9. Sid Vicious played a four-string Fender bass guitar and couldn't sing / And everybody hated him except the ones who loved him
    Ukulele anthem. Amanda palmer.
  10. I hope that our few remaining friends / Give up on trying to save us / I hope we come up with a fail-safe plot / To piss off the dumb few that forgave us
    No children. The mountain goats.
  11. Tarzan wasn't a ladies' man / He'd just come along and scoop 'em up under his arm like that / Quick as a cat in the jungle
    Superman's song. Crash test dummies
  12. I'm living in the 21st century / doin' something mean to it
    Power. Kanye West
    Suggested by @Kellendria
  13. I'm waiting on the sun to set cause yesterday ain't over yet/I started smoking cigarettes, there's nothing else to do I guess.
    Miranda Lambert - Kerosene
    Suggested by @mandi
  14. She, she ain't real/ she ain't gonna be able to love you like I will
    Adele, Rumor Has It
    Suggested by @mandi
  15. I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour, but heaven knows I'm miserable now.
    Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now by The Smiths
    Suggested by @alissamaynot
  16. What the hell am I doing down in Kansas City?
    Pat Green, Southbound 35
    Suggested by @donnie
  17. if you said goodbye to me tonight, there would still be music left to write
    the longest time. billy joel
    Suggested by @rebeccazemel
  18. Somebody once told me / the world is gonna roll me / I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
    All Star - Smashmouth. Big ups to Shrek.
    Suggested by @grownwomanchild
  19. I was having this discussion in a taxi heading downtown, rearranging my position on this friend of mine who had a little bit of a breakdown.
    Paul Simon / Gumboots. Remarkable for its rhythmic perfection and lyrical complexity.
    Suggested by @gwcoffey
  20. I'm loaded, ready, calmly holding steady. Looking for a sign to tell me when. I'm waiting, willing, the clarity is chilling. I'm not turning back and neither can you.
    Matthew Sweet / Shoot. This song is pretty brutal when you listen to the words. Haven't thought about it in years until just now when I started ransacking my brain for first interesting first lines.
    Suggested by @gwcoffey
  21. I can hardy bear the sight of lipstick on the cigarettes there in the ashtray.
    Elvis Costello / A Good Year for the Roses. I love moving scenes that juxtapose beauty and ugliness.
    Suggested by @gwcoffey
  22. Baby if the cake ain't missing How'd that icing get all over you, you girl?
    Point of No Return, written by Jim Ford, best sung by Bobby Womack
    Suggested by @charlottery