What is wrong with each of these? If you don't know, I do not love you.
  1. You could of joined the circus, but instead you went to grad school.
  2. Occassionally, I eat raw rhubarb.
  3. Please put this dildo over they're on my hope chest.
  4. Your going to love it when I lay this hot pizza cheese-side down on your face.
  5. (I wonder what Uncle Rupert thinks of unresolved parentheses?
  6. I recently had a threesome with your parents, the mailman and Dr. Jones.
    Haha, everyone on @list hates this one, apparently, but fuck off.
  7. I'm going to the rodeo to kill the rodeo clown irregardless of what you think.
  8. Kiss I. Kiss I right on the mouth.
  9. Your armpit smell has a powerful aphrodisiac affect on me.
  10. Please stop playing Candy Crush on my iPad; its low on power and I need to recharge it.
  11. Who's breasts did I just accidentally grab?
  12. Last week, Edna borrowed me her blanket so I would be warm when Gramma made me sleep out in the shed.
  13. After Garth side-kicked my face, I had a lose incisor tooth!
  14. I want to fly on the back of a Phoenix for alot of time.
  15. I got super drunk on Carlo Rossi sangria, my puke was purple.
  16. And the camel exploded.
  17. The severed camel's head up on the minibar!
  18. He fell out of the motorcycle's sidecar, and split his gourd open.
  19. Batman fly through the air with amazing bat-wings.
  20. You literally just blew my brains out with that idea.
  21. Alright, who put this grenade in my bra?
  22. It could have been any one!
  23. Whom gave the mouse a cookie?
  24. The sight of Superman's Fortress of Solitude is The North Pole.
  25. I can not decide who I want to shag this evening.
  26. I will enjoy your comments on this list later than!