THE MONSTER AT THE END OF THIS LIST

Dedicated to Grover
  1. Please do not read past this bullet point. There is a terrible monster at the end of this list and I am scared of monsters.
  2. For real, there's an awful, flesh-eating monster down there at the bottom of the list. The further you scroll down, the closer we both get to it. So please stop now!
  3. Ok, I see. I am going to have to take matters into my own hands in order to prevent us both from being devoured by the monster.
  4. I will make you get lost in an emoji forest!
  5. 🌲🌳🌳🌲🌳🌲🌳🌳🌲🌳🌲🌳🌴🌲
  6. You found your way through the forest, eh? Well you'll never find your way out of this enormous metropolis!
  7. 🏢🏦🏥🏤🏢🏢🏭🏬🏨🏫🏪🏠🏣🏥
  8. So you just walked right through the city to this bullet point using the iPhone Maps app, eh?
  9. I will bribe you! I will pay you off. Here is a million dollars!:
  10. 💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵💵
  11. It isn't very ethical of you to take the money and STILL proceed toward the monster!
  12. Hey, let's relax and do some ecstasy. Wanna? Forget about that damned monster already. Lay back. Pop one of these:
  13. 💊💊
  14. THIS MONSTER IS GOING TO CHEW US UP AND KILL US BOTH. WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU. GOT A DEATH WISH, HUH?
  15. Listen. The monster is very close now. Please stop. Here is my sister:
  16. 👧🏻
  17. Okay, and my brother, too:
  18. 👦
  19. You can't go any further or you'll step in shit!
  20. 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
  21. You just stepped right over the shit!
  22. Stop.
  23. Stop, you.
  24. Let's watch a movie 🎥
  25. Let's listen to music 🎵🎵
  26. Want a cigarette? 🚬
  27. Have you played that new Xbox game? 🎮🎮 It's soooooo much fun.
  28. The monster is four bullets away. I'm begging you. Close this list. And. Walk. Away.
  29. I'll shoot you! 🔫 I'll stab you! 🔪
  30. He's right behind that door. If you open it, WE BOTH DIE!! AAAAAAAHH!
  31. 🚪
  32. 👹