HOW TO BE CONFIDENT WHEN YOU'RE NOT

My strange methods of "fake it till you make it"
  1. Assume all Craigslist Missed Connections are about you
    Yeah I was probably at Target on La Brea. Weird they think I have blond hair instead of red. I guess they will always think of me.
  2. Listen to some "feeling bad ass music"
    Currently listening to Dark Dames playlist on Apple Music. Feel pretty cool after.
  3. Hang out with old people.
    They will always make you feel young since compared to them you are.
  4. Heels, big hat, leather
    I automatically feel cooler with any or all of these items.
  5. Wear sunglasses indoors sometimes
    I can barely see them, so they can't see me right. They probably think I'm famous or something.
  6. Brand name perfume.
    I'm broke but Sephora gives samples. Yup, I'll be wearing that Marc Jacobs. Don't I smell so sensual!
  7. Think about the apocalypse.
    Strange I know. But being the most flawless girl won't keep you alive in the apocalypse. Being smart will. I can name all 50 states. Therefore I will survive the apocalypse, flawless or not.
  8. Eat wth chopsticks.
    It feels like you accomplished something with you day simply by feeding yourself.
  9. Drink out of a wine glass.
    Wine, water, or Gatorade; sweatpants feel classier with a wine glass in your hand.