THINGS I'VE OVERSHARED
As my last list reveals, I like to tell white lies. But there are some days where instead of white lies, I tell extremely inappropriate truths.
- •"I like turtlenecks because they cover up the rash on my neck."
- •"I'm mostly attracted to older men. Like really old."
- •"Today I peed so hard it was frothy enough to make a latte"
- •"I don't think I've clipped my toenails in months"
- •"I kind of like the way my BO smells."
- •"I'll probably wear these jeans like two more times before I wash them."
- •"Honestly if I'm mean to you I'm probably hitting on you"
- •"Whenever I think about the human body I immediately take a shower"