Mother knows best!
  1. You’re the one they call whenever they need to be unstuck, as a group, from the laundry chute.
  2. At the movies, you sit in the row behind your friends to watch their necks for signs of viral meningitis.
  3. You always smell the pool before you let your friends dive in.
  4. You’re the one who’s addicted to slot machines.
  5. Every time you give birth, it’s to a new cool friend for the group to chill with.
  6. You’re the one who makes the sauce, and you’re the one who brings the sauce.
  7. Every time the group goes tap-dancing, you’re the one in the middle who does that windmill grand-finale thing.