Some of My Onions

  1. Emojis are meant to be used in groups of three. End of story. 😎🍻💯
  2. It's crazy that anyone with $30 can own a laminator and just laminate shit whenever they want
  3. Glasses and contacts should not cost me money because I did not ASK to have awful eyes
  4. In that vein, healthcare should be free. Let's go, America
  5. Health insurance should include dental. Why are they separate??? It's all in your body??? Wtf
  6. Baby clothes should NEVER have buttons that serve a purpose. Baby jeans don't need a button. Baby shirts don't need buttons. Keep your kids comfy. (Exception: onesie buttons)
  7. Child clothes up to size 4T should never cost more than $10 but preferably like $4. They're gonna ruin it within a month, they're gonna grow out of it before ink dries on the receipt, and it's like half an inch of fabric. Ridiculous
  8. Babies should wear leggings and big t shirts all of the time. Because it is cute
  9. Arthur is a quality television program that can and should be enjoyed at any age
  10. People shouldn't call themselves any particular label pertaining to their diet because it causes nothing but stress and sadness. You don't have to declare yourself a vegan, just make a choice every meal.
  11. Yogurt and milk should not be consumed in the same sitting because that much dairy is nauseating