1. My father used to pride himself on waiting until Thanksgiving to turn on the heat.
    The best I ever managed was November 1. Plus, my father never lived this far North.
  2. My entire family is getting sick.
    Not a good sign. My personal contribution toward the health care system. You're welcome.
  3. My son was spotted wearing a stocking cap and gloves around the house.
    He has however never been a fashion maven.
  4. I'm wearing a coat inside.
    Albeit, not my heavy winter coat.
  5. My wife doesn't find my line "I know how we can warm up" funny.
    Even when I add a wink, still not funny. Plus, never successful.
  6. The dog follows us around everywhere for body heat.
    I believe a Baby Bjorn is the next step.
  7. I ride around in the car to get warm.
    Okay, it's time. Flip the switch. Let there be heat.