Honest Reasons I Could Not Hear My Wife

After five hours in the car with my family that involved me constantly leaning over and saying, "Could you repeat that?" or "Sorry, I cannot hear you," my wife is convinced that I need hearing aids. I think the following are the actual reasons.
  1. 1.
    Kids
    Loud, loud children. Very close. Did I mention very loud?
  2. 2.
    Rain
    Dull constant mind numbing rain. Coupled with the windshield wiper cadence. Mile, after mile, after mile. Please, dear Lord, make it stop.
  3. 3.
    Vehicle "Hum"
    Nothing wrong. Just a hum. Always there. Haunting me. Redhum, redhum.
  4. 4.
    Radio
    Why must the family insist on the radio? We have not found a good station in over an hour. When even "National" Public Radio can no longer find you, you are out there. Way out there.
  5. 5.
    My Wife's Voice
    Perfectly blends into a pitch to match the radio. Impossible to hear, as the car hums along, the rain pitter patters, the wiper blades thump, and the kids are constantly one level down from a sustained yell. Oh, my poor ears don't need hearing aids, they need a vacation.