Mythical Personalities and Parental Burdens
Spoiler Alert! (@andersun Thank you for the save!)
- 1.My 8-year-old lost a tooth at school.
- 2.The School Nurse gave him a cute little "tooth holder."
- 3.I found a gold dollar.
- 4.I was ready for the exchange.
- 5.Then I fell asleep.
- 7.Waking up, I realized my blunder.
- 8.I snuck into my son's room, put the gold dollar in place, and... could not get the tooth holder open! Damn!
- 9.Son wakes up.
- 10.I play it all cool like, "Hey, what did you get?"
- 11.Son notices the tooth still remaining and starts crying.
- 12.I point out the coin. In the dark, he says, "It's only a quarter." More tears.
- 13.I turn on the light and say, "Look, it's a gold dollar!"
- 14.Unwilling to be happy, he says, "I just got a dollar?"
- 15.Hey kid, that's the going rate. I believe Janet Yellen and the Feds establish it quarterly.
- 16.Ugh. Tooth Fairy. Santa. Easter Bunny. All of these secret personality burdens are really wearing me down.