Eating disorders suck balls

I'm 31, I've suffered from an ED in one form or another for over half my life. I started treatment last year and am just starting to realise how effed up my life is.
  1. I don't LOOK ill
    Well not in the way you'd expect someone with an eating disorder to look. In its current incarnation my diagnosis is bulimia but I'm also over weight. Turns out that when you starve yourself and then binge on foods with no nutritional value that can happen even if you purge.
  2. It's expensive as hell
    There are a lot of health implications obviously but having bulimia is expensive! I spend hundreds of pounds a month on food I do not want and eliminate from my body as soon as possible. I am in debt because of this.
  3. Laxative addiction
    As repulsive as it sounds and additionally incredibly dangerous.
  4. Scarred hands and a bruised throat
    From shoving my fingers down my throat
  5. Irregular heartbeat
    From low levels of minerals.
  6. Crappy skin and a puffy face
    Repeated vomiting can burst blood vessels and can cause dehydration, leading to dry skin, weak muscles, and extreme fatigue. Swollen salivary glands can cause a puffy face.
  7. But I don't know how to fix me
    I'm getting dietetics support now but no psychology support and I don't know how to advocate for myself.
  8. If you're suffering too get help
    I have wasted so many years to this, don't be me.