10 THINGS I'VE LEARNED ON LIST
Not ranked. Thanks for the request. It was fun to think about!
- 1.I've gotten better at speaking up for myself.You may not know it, but you guys have given me the words I sometimes can't come up with on my own, plus a little spark of confidence. I may still shake but I'm doing it. Sometimes I even picture you all right there behind me cheering me on, and I don't even feel too weird saying that because I think you get it.
- 2.I've become more empathetic, and less quick to judge or make assumptions about people in general (not always so good about the judging, truthfully, but I'm trying).There is such variety and depth to listers' lives and experiences. I'm really grateful to people who put themselves out there in their lists. It has been enlightening.
- 3.I've learned a massive amount about privilege, race, and feminism.And I still have tons to learn, but I can thank many of you (past and present) for helping me realize that. I'm still sorry that the people who were most involved in having those conversations didn't stay around. It wasn't always pretty (regardless of which "side" you were on), but it was important.
- 4.I've learned when not to chime in.I don't usually anyway but there's a difference when it's born of shyness. I think I have a better understanding now of how and when to listen without needing to offer my own perspective.
- 5.I've learned about my myself.I've had some really good aha moments, whether writing or reading. I'm normally pretty introspective anyway, but having a dedicated place to write and think has been helpful to clarify my thoughts.
- 6.I've remembered that I'm a whole person outside of being a mom.Being home with my kids can feel isolating, and much of my social interaction is in relation to them. This lovely little community helped me remember myself apart from that role, and alleviated a lot of boredom.
- 7.I've gotten a little funnier.I can't banter as well as most of you, but reading it always makes me laugh. I'm trying to lighten up a little, and you guys help me remember not to take myself quite so seriously.
- 8.I've discovered new podcasts, music, books, and pop culture trivia. I've added to my food and travel wish lists, and marveled at how knowledgeable you guys are.This is honestly one of the things that makes me smile the most. I love that people want to discuss books and podcasts and board games and new words, because those things are fun for me. And I love reading about other people's passions even if I don't share them, because your happiness makes me happy too.
- 9.I've grown to appreciate the legitimacy of online relationships and friendships.This is my first foray into social media. Heck, I didn't even have a smartphone until 2 years ago. I still struggle with my own place in it, in part because the lack of tone and body language can be hard (plus the usual hefty dose of self-doubt). But I understand now how very real the feelings and friendships are and how much they mean to people, even if those people haven't ever met face to face. It's pretty awesome.
- 10.I've learned that change is inevitable.I already know I am uncomfortable with change, even in small doses, but it's been interesting to examine how personally I take it. I can't say it's gotten easier yet. Maybe some day. (And I obviously don't just mean updates.)