Things I Learn at the Gym

  1. No one has bought new workout clothes since 1996
  2. They play the song Rehab by Amy Winehouse a lot despite the end of that health and fitness journey...
  3. There is the perfect smoothie for every waking minute of your life
  4. Testicles come in all shapes and sizes... They are like snowflakes
  5. I sweat more on my right arm than my left
  6. Nobody uses the the weird machine behind the elliptical because it's unclear what it does
  7. Nobody wants to tell me how to do a proper squat
  8. Everyone can do more push-ups than me. Everyone.