Someone's been slut shaming me recently and I was just not in the mood, you guys.
  1. In 2015, I slept with ten different men.
  2. Five of these men were one-time experiences. Only one was a true one-night stand. The other four I had gone out on dates with (sometimes many) before consenting to have sex with them. And then it just didn't work out. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  3. Five of these men I cared about A LOT and slept with multiple times.
  4. I used protection with every person. I got tested after every person. (My health insurance is pretty good and it's not expensive to do.)
  5. That number is not a reflection of my character.
  6. That number is not a reflection of my intelligence.
  7. That number is not a reflection of my self-respect.
    But my dedication to protecting myself IS.
  8. Every person I slept with, I slept with monogamously. I can't date multiple people at once. It stresses me out.
  9. (But even if I was sleeping with people non-monogamously, who cares?)
  10. None of these sexual experiences affected my ability to be a good daughter, sister, friend, employee, or person.
  11. I am not ashamed of that number. If you looked at me, your first thought wouldn't be, "Wow. That girl looks like she's slept with ten guys this year!"
  12. Your first thought would probably be, "Wow, this girl looks like she eats a lot of Cheetos."
  13. And you'd be right.
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    I didn't get this butt from eating kale, that's for sure. Also, please enjoy my Target brand cotton underwear.
  14. I fucking love Cheetos.
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  16. But Cheetos means a great time.
  17. This post was sponsored by Cheetos.
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