Reasons I Regret Paying $5 for the Fantastic 4 - While Watching Fantastic 4

  1. A kid built a teleportstion device using N64 consoles.
  2. A 16 year old used the phrase "it's clobbering time" when bullying his little brother
  3. Also there was a Menorah in the bully's house
  4. Everybody in the science fair assumed the (now adult-teen) boy's WORKING teleporter was "magic"
  5. "So you like music? Is that kind of your thing?" WHO SAYS THAT??
  6. How are there that many geniuses under 30 and no scientists over 40?
  7. The only positive is that there's more diversity than in "The Intern"
  8. It took them way too long to get to the super powers
  9. Worst head-butt I've ever seen on a screen
  10. Von Doom is pretty much a cheap Halloween costume with expensive lights
  11. Doom unnecessarily killed everyone, but decided to spare the only people who could stop him
  12. "He's mine"
  13. I just realized I don't care about any of the characters
  14. So Victor basically becomes a Demi-God, but then just gets thrown off a ledge and he's down for the count??
  15. If there's a Blackhole that's been ripping through earth for this long, I'm pretty sure billions have died by now...
  16. The Fantastic 4 just decided hey need to work together to win. SHOCKER
  17. "It's clobbering time" ugh
  18. I kinda feel like they deserved to lose that fight...
  19. They're just waiting to say "Fantastic 4"
  20. THEY JUST SAID "FANTASTIC" I hate this
  21. The credits are rolling... I'm not waiting for the bonus segment