LIVE TWEETS THAT SHOULD NEVER EXIST
- •Live tweeting each and every one of my daily breathsIn. Out. In. Out. In. Out
- •Live tweeting my Brazilian waxing session"Okay so the wax is on. This mission is a go. FULL STEAM AHEAD"
- •Live tweeting a deeply painful bike crash"Guys OMG...this guy in front of me is biking like assheajdbajamdbsjamhyaz"
- •Live tweeting a colonoscopy"Take a deep breath he said...this might pinch just a little"
- •Live tweeting the mid-day lull at work"Barbara fucking jammed the paper in the printer again, dammit Barbara"
- •Live tweeting a classified meeting with the FBI"Area 51 is real and we need you to come meet our supreme leader there...Elvis"
- •Live tweeting my paint drying"The azure seems to be drying at the same rate as the beige, oh wow this so amaze"