REPERCUSSIONS OF USING OXFORD TINDER
Well. I can't say I didn't know better. I've learned my lesson. STATUS: CURRENTLY NEVER SWIPING AGAIN
- •Avoiding awkward eye contact on campus
- •Those awkward 'real life introductions, but we already know exactly who each other are' moments
- •Seeing strangers in full academic dress on the street and having the realization that you have also swiped and seen them in their full bare ass glory
- •Underlying sexual tension
- •Facing All The Fuckboiz - Who know you swiped right and you refuse to reply toYou secretly feel a little guilty because somewhere deep down inside they're actually decent guys
- •Intimidating stares from intelligent strangers in academic gowns
- •Leaving Oxford and feeling as though you've become a satirical mythological tinder unicorn*Sitting in hall at dinner time and over hearing a conversation to your direct left" Lad 1: "Jake, wait that girl. Right there, up a row" Lad 2: "Yeah what about it....?" Lad 1: "I swear that's her, I think we matched on tinder" Lad 2: "No way, really" Lad 1: "yeah! No I swear. Right there, that's her. RIGHT THERE LOOK"
- •That horrible moment when you realize you might have a swiping addiction. You don't know how many times you've swiped right. You lost track early on...you need helpIs there such thing as tinder rehab?
- •Any situation involving public dining halls
- •Any situation involving the general male student body/ public
- •Regretting the 'tinder swipe right olympics' that you started between yourself and your roommate
- •Awkward dates you went on that felt more like obligations since you had too many mutual friends
- •Fearing that someone you actually have the 'feels' for didn't swipe right
- •Realizing that you effectively used Oxford Tinder for a full term. It exists and it's too real...