Pops really threw a wrench in my plans and made the last minute decision to use my oven to cook the bird. These are the silly questions he asked me.
  1. "You're awake?"
    Yes, I am. You called. I answered
  2. "Do you know how to turn on your oven?"
  3. "You're home?"
    Yeah, obvi. I just opened the door for you. We just spoke on the phone 10 minutes ago. Why would I leave?
  4. "Who told you to do that?"
    I just rubbed butter on the turkey. Food Network, Biatch!