Things That Should Not Surprise You About Episode 1 of American Horror Story: Hotel
Well I watched it. I knew I was going to and I did. Here's what I learned:
- •The carpet pattern in the lobby of this hotel looks enough like the carpet from the Overlook Hotel in the Shining to be noteworthy.
- •This hotel has creepy identically dressed kids (like in the Shining).
- •This hotel's got ghost junkies, baby!
- •Heroin use is punishable by drill-do* rape at the hands of a faceless gimp. (*a dildo that's actually a sharp drill).
- •The creators of this show think that the best way to convey sexual decadence is by showing Lady Gaga in bedazzled nips and a black thong.
- •A Cinespia screening of Nosferatu at Hollywood Forever cemetery is only attended by about 40 extras.
- •Those Shining ghost-twins invite a kid to play video games with them and might as well be saying "come play with us, Danny."
- •Ryan Murphy wants you to know that he HAS in fact seen The Shining.
- •This show, about a hotel in California where you can check out but can never leave, ends it's first episode by playing Hotel California by The Eagles in it's entirety.
- •The Shining holds up!