🇬🇧 BRITISH THINGS NOBODY TELLS YOU

So I am Chinese and while growing up in the Western world from a very young age there are things I would have never known as my parents are immigrants. Here are the things I learnt the hard/embarrassing way cause no one told me. I went through this so you don't have to...
  1. Scotland Yard is not in Scotland
    This is the police HQ in the UK. I don't see why people were so amazed I thought this - THE NAME SAYS SCOTLAND! Though I did think 'why is the HQ in Scotland shouldn't it be in London?' FYI it is in London.
  2. Mince pies does not contain mince meat
    Not sure if mince pies are just a UK thing but it's definitely not a Chinese thing. So the 'mince' part is referring to mince fruit and not meat. These mini pies come out at Xmas time and friends would offer them for dessert. Here I am thinking 'why would anyone offer a meat pie for dessert? No thank you!'.
  3. Holborn, Marylebone, Leicester Square, Southwark, Chiswick Park, Greenwich, Ruislip, Bermondsey.
    These Underground Stations are not pronounce the way you think they should be or spelt. Basically here to mess with you, so 'locals' can spot the tourist/non-Londoners/fresh-off-the-boaters. I might have missed out some so apologies. I would advice googling for the UK pronunciation or wait for the station announcement on the tube.
  4. Reading is pronoun Reading not Reading!
    Similar to the above but it's getting its own point cause of the trauma I went through regarding this. I have never been here why would I know it's pronoun Reading and not Reading??? ALSO SPELT THE SAME! I'd like to see you pronounce Chinese places. FYI- It's pronoun past tense of reading.
  5. Twat is a swear word meaning vagina
    Other kids used this around me a lot when I was in school. Unlike the normal swear words I have never heard this being used, not even accidentally by my parents who at this point only really knew the English swear words. So didn't know what it meant (though it makes sense now) other then kids usually used it like you would the word 'jerk' so I thought it meant the same thing. In a moment of pure frustration in a classroom debate I shouted this at a boy...you can guess the rest.