BIRTHDAY DRINKS, RANKED

I celebrated my birthday with parties for five nights in a row (mostly not my choice), capped off with an "anything goes" final night that may have been the drink straw that broke the camel's liver. here are some beverage highlights from that final night, ranked.
  1. Old Fashioned
    bourbon not rye, handmade, best drink of the night. it was all downhill from here in every sense of the word. I think Austin or Jeff got me this one? the night was hazy.
  2. Modelo Especial
    because I am Especial
  3. whatever KayKay bought me
    it was clear on the bottom, black on the top half. over ice. blackberry flavor in there somewhere.
  4. Moscow Mule
    copper mug because I'm a sucker for Pinterest
  5. Dirty Shirley
    I was never explicitly told what was in this drink, but I think it's just a Shirley Temple with vodka (a girl purchased ordered me this one because she wanted me to drink something pink)
  6. random cheap beer? (x??)
    the kind that spells "light" as "lite" and makes me die a little inside (specifically the liver part of the inside)
  7. shots of fireball whiskey (x3)
    again, not my call and no idea why people love this stuff.
  8. rum and coke (x2)
    apparently I have friends who still order drinks like it's college.
  9. shot of cheap vodka
    this was toward the end of the night, this one hurt.
  10. whatever my brother bought me
    which I'm sure was great, but by the end of the night it all just tasted like regret. happy birthday to the ground!
  11. …I should drink less